Hayden Panettiere, Heroes starlet and lust object for the entire male population, has the world by the tail – so it’s no surprise that, like
Lindsay Lohan, Scarlett Johansson and (cringe) Heidi Montag before her, she’s decided to branch into music with her new single Wake Up Call.
We’re curious: what is it that makes so many young mediocre actresses think they can rock the mic? There’s a lesson to be learned here - a decent voice and a hot bod does not a singer make. Despite what American Idol might say.
We’re also a little concerned about Hayden’s message in this song, which entails giving her boyfriend a “Wake Up Call” because he’s not paying enough attention to her or buying her enough flowers or something. Check out these lyrical gems:
“It seems like I gotta do wrong, to get your attenti-o-n, but maybe when I call this man up, you’ll finally start to wake up.”
“I think I’m gonna have to cheat to keep your eyes on meeeee, but maybe if I make you jealous, you’ll finally start to wake up.”
Um Hayden? If you feel like you need to cheat because he’s not paying attention to you, it’s probably time to break up anyway. One of you (or potentially both of you) is a major scumbag, so better just call it a day.
Seriously, that “cheat because I have to” angle is sick. It’s right on par with Heidi Montag’s lyrical barf-fest Fashion, and we think between the two of these dim-bulb songstresses, the state of humanity just got a little bit worse.
Save the Music, Save the World...or Something
Hayden, we used to admire you for all your charitable work and we can easily understand why the male population finds you so beautiful. But frankly, this single makes us want to punch a dolphin square in the mouth and if any man can listen to it and still keep his motor running for you, we’d like to see it.
We know there’s not much to do in the Heroes off-season, but maybe you could take up knitting. Or Parcheesi. Or anything but music. Because this song is terrible and somewhere Paris Hilton is thinking Stars are Blind is a good song. And for that you must pay.
Think Hayden’s Style is Better than Her Singing?
Get her glam look with this Via Nova satchel purse, or another elegant handbag from InStyleHandbag.com. Click on image for product details.